Giving away Christmas.

So yeah…we’ve talked about it, prayed about it, and we feel pretty strongly that this is the right thing for OUR family at this time. We are biting the bullet, having the ‘talk’, returning the gifts, and GIVING AWAY CHRISTMAS. Yes, you read that correctly – Christmas as we know it will not longer occur in the Norton household. We have been convicted, challenged, moved…whatever you want to call it…to make some changes, to ‘take a stand.’ For a while now it has been upsetting and unsettling to us how spoiled and ungrateful our kids are / can be. We have taken some other steps to improve this, but we feel like something drastic NEEDS to be done. We have too much STUFF as it is…we are slaves to it and certainly don’t need any more! On top of that, they had a conversation the other day that sealed it for us…Savy was asking when we were going to put up the tree…because we needed lights…because Santa won’t come if we don’t have lights!! Now, I’m not denying that it was a little cute…and we’ve been going back and forth on the decorating issue because we are moving in about 10 days (PRAISE GOD…we finally found a house in Hillandale’s District! – Now Savy can go to school with her brother next year ;) BUT…here is my issue…AND this is what I said ‘NOW HANG ON! Is Christmas REALLY JUST about lights and Santa?!?! I mean…WHO is Christmas REALLY about???’ Now…thankfully they both did respond with the correct sing-song ‘JESUS…’ answer! ;) But I was so irritated by then…

I wish we could totally quit cold-turkey…I would LOVE to do that, but then again I also think that is a little harsh – since we HAVE created this monster. So here is our plan…each person is getting 1 gift this year ($25 limit) from us…and Santa (yes…they still believe…) will still bring stockings. And that is IT. Now for the REST…for all the other people who we would normally buy gifts for (parents, siblings, teachers, friends, etc) we will be purchasing charitable gifts in their honor (the kids will pick these out). In addition – the kids will be helping to make cookies and crafts (ornaments, etc) and we will be delivering these to local nursing homes, hospitals, etc. We are also looking into local missions and soup kitchens to find a place where we can go and serve others on Christmas Day and throughout the Holiday season.
So, yeah – we (and by we…I mean Jay ;) loaded up the van yesterday and I returned ALL the gifts…then we sat down together (just the man and I) and had dinner on the couch. And to be honest…I don’t think we have ever felt so good about a joint decision we have made and done for our kids.

I leave you with the words of Tiny Tim…God bless us, everyone.

God’s Grace is simply amazing....

I had a heartbreaking day at work on Monday…I had a L-O-N-G meeting, but that wasn’t the hard part.  It was the realization of ‘what could be’…that truly broke my heart.  I have very few students that come from a 2 parent, church-going, issue-free household ;)  But this new student in particular…hmmm.  Well, here’s the thing…if it were not for God’s Grace and the difference of probably 10-20 HORRIBLE days in his life…he could be…MY son.  Seriously, no kidding.  The entire time I was sitting there I just kept thinking…OH MY GOODNESS…this could be Justice.  This could SO be Justice…and THAT could be me (the mom sitting there!)  Really…for those of you that didn’t have the pleasure of knowing me…I was NOT an easy kid    I was…much like my sweet Justice…shocker, I know!  I was high maintenance, I have made mistakes, but we have raised a GREAT kid…but for the Grace of God.  Because, like I said….that could have been him, sitting there with me.  I could have NOT stopped with alcohol in college and turned to drugs…I could have had more kids…and then walked away at my wits end on a bad day…I could have stayed in THAT relationship, and he would have beat ME.  The reality of the difference of a few simple weeks and God’s sweet, pure, simple grace…was almost too much for me to handle that day…it has taken me several days to digest it all and get this blog done.

Old dog, new tricks...

I don’t take compliments well.  I got pretty much the same one today, twice :/ YIKES…the first time it was a raging, venting, UGH, not pretty fest…I walked away, ended in tears.  I think that I needed it though, because I had an epiphany somewhere between the beginning of the day when that occurred and the middle of the day when the next time happened.  The second time, I seemed to SOMEHOW…politely manage to say…thank you ;) 

I am blessed with great kids.  Amazing ones really, still not quite sure on most days just WHY God has entrusted ME with them!?  They are brilliant, smarter than either of their parents…beautiful…sometimes she looks at me with that tan face and blond hair and those electric blue eyes - and it DOES hurt.  It’s painful…she truly is SO stunning that it takes your breath away, and it hurts.  And he’s just precious with that nose full of freckles, and those teeth I keep praying he’ll grow into.

But we’ve had another ROUGH week.  School this year seems to be a huge adjustment for him.  EVERYTHING is just so different, he is having a very hard time settling in.  Now, his behavior is fine there, but he is EXHAUSTED by the time we see him every day.  And…well basically he just doesn’t have much ‘good’ left for us.  I'm not quite sure what the teen years have in store...but if Savannah's morning 'dressing drama' routine continues...OMG Parochial School with uniforms...I'm just sayin!   Last Friday they were in the bed asleep by 6:30, not bad…I beat ‘em, I fell asleep on the couch at 6:00!  By this morning, they had both lost the privilege of going to daddy’s game tonight.  Which they were both VERY disappointed about, but were also VERY tired…so I knew they would be in bed early.  So basically this only REALLY sucked…FOR ME!! But as most decent parents know…we do time, when our kids do the crime…

Which I guess sorta brings me to the compliment…I was talking to a co-worker early this a.m. (I had a student in my room who has a similar label/disability as my son - but is very different from my son) and she made the comment that ‘she would never have known my son had asperger’s/autism’ (now this is someone who we spent about 1 day a week with all summer long) Now this is the part where I SHOULD have said ‘THANK YOU’…but you know me :P I of course feel the need to unload apparently (poor sweet girl…) and explain how she WOULD see it if she spent any extended time with him, and how our life is a constant 24/7 exhausting battle, basically that we do live in pure hell, have no friends, no life, a struggling marriage hanging on by a thread…ALL in the hopes that he will turn out well adjusted in the long run. Because we HAVE fought those battles, made him toe the line, not given in, lived through the hell…

This was about the point I walked away because the tears were coming.  I’m not sure about the epiphany…except for the fact that it just felt better after I said all that…Like..all this crap, everything we are going through. It DOES have a point.  We are trying to create the best man we can.

Cut to around lunchtime…one of my best friends Pam was there.  She used to work there, but now is doing a co-op with our bookkeeper Miss Bobbi (who also happens to be her mom ;)  I was talking to them and Miss Bobbi told me that Pam’s mother-in-law (we had all been at a pool party together last weekend) had complimented the kids.  She had said that they were very good, and that I was really good with them (I had SOOO many comments for THAT one) but I simply said, ‘REALLY? Wow…thanks, tell her I said THANK YOU!’

I don’t know if Justice will ever learn, but maybe you can teach some old dog’s a few new tricks.

They weren’t in bed by 6:30 tonight...we were watching The Muppet Movie.  Justice LOVES the music…Rainbow Connection was my favorite and is his too.  Savy loves Miss Piggy….she is after all The Princess.

A$$ Burgers...SAY What?!?!?!

Seriously? Again? You have NO IDEA…and for THAT you should count your blessings.  What am I talking about you may ask?  Oh…just our little Autistic afternoon meltdown ritual L  It’s a cycle we seem to be in since we returned from Spring Break…Oh, I’m not talking about the typical,  “MOM! He touched me!”  Or the fit caused by hearing the word “NO.”  If you have a kid you’ve ‘been there, done that’…

Oh no…I’m talking about the ‘see it in his eye’s as he flings the door open-type’ meltdown…the kind that you can see in his eyes cause his pupils are SO tiny…or that you KNOW is coming because he’s talking SO fast he can’t even take a breath…THAT’S the meltdown I’m talking about.  And sometimes it builds slowly, but still…there’s no stopping it.  It’s coming, no matter what ~ the screaming, the tears, knocking stuff over…getting so mad…all because he’s just so frustrated, or upset, or worried…and he just can’t explain it.  And it breaks my heart…and makes me want to strangle him…all at once ;)  Such is the roller-coaster of life that we live on…

Today it was ‘RE-GROUPING’ - damn math..lol…I know how he feels ;)  You see, he puts a TREMENDOUS amount of pressure on himself (his parents were NOT like this in school ;) and if he is NOT perfect gets very mad at himself, very ‘down’ on himself…etc.  Well, apparently re-grouping’s a weakness…which manifested into an issue with homework, which ultimately involved unauthorized calculator use LOL, a discussion of said unauthorized use, the ensuing meltdown (that if I had been more ‘on my game’ and not SO worn out from my OWN 5th and 6th periods I may have caught…ok I suck ;) the ensuing ‘mama fit’ LOL  Let’s just say that we BARELY got Savy picked up by 5:30 today..HAHA.   I did have to leave my room a few times, did have to photocopy his homework sheet to make a new one, did have to use just about EVERY trick I know, dry erase boards, swaddling, you name it…OMG Freakin EXHAUSTING, maybe it wouldn’t be if I didn’t ALSO do this ALL DAY LONG!! HELLOOOO…  Ok I’ll take a deep breath now..LOL  But for real people…

After dinner Savy said that she wanted to take a bath with me “a hot, quiet bath…” and by ‘quiet’ she means JUST the 2 of us…how could I resist???

Say it ant so....

If I've said it once, I've said it a million times...I have the funniest kids!!  Don't believe me? Read on....this is the ACTUAL conversation that took place at our breakfast table this morning before church.  First of all, YES, we actually ALL do sit down together for most meals...breakfast and dinner just about everyday, it's something Jay and I are committed to :)  So that part wasn't very funny..lol but the conversation was HILARIOUS...it started out innocent enough.  A conversation about allergies...Savy "Mama - I'm not allergic to anything am I?"  "Nope, Sav, you're not" again Savy "and Justice and Daddy...they aren't either?" "Nope, don't think so..."  Savy keeps talking.."ok mama...well, does Hunter Mangum have any cats?"  Now to me this is both funny..and RANDOM! But you have to understand..Savy LOVES her some 'Hunter Mangum' LOL (and she always says it just like that....Hunter Mangum :) and 1. (I don't YET realize that she is plotting) and 2. she also SUPER LOVES her some MISS Pam, Hunter's mama! So I answer her "um no, I don't think so"  At this point Justice chimes in "Yes he does, at his grandma's"  "oh, ok" I say...So Savy, her EVIL PLOT about to become clear...adds "SO since Hunter Mangum doesn't have cats, YOU can go live there mama, at his house, with his mama, CAUSE I REALLY want 2 cats, girl ones!" OMG  She just plotted to ship me off...LMAO Does this happen at other people's houses?!?!  By the 3 year old?!?!?  Now of course I LOVE me some MISS Pam too, so my first question was "well, will you come visit?" lol  Jay didn't like that! HAHAHA

The second best part was that the meal was only about half over....then she says "you know GRAND is WRONG about napkins!" and I am thinking?!?!?  What in the WORLD???  To which Justice replies "NO she's NOT, GRAND isn't wrong about ANYTHING!"  LMAO  Now, he is SOOO much my son, it ant (another Savy word) even funny!  But in that declaration he so instantly was ALL Daddy's boy and Grand's Poot-a-Root-a :)   She continued "well, yes she is, napkins don't go in laps!!"  At this point..ALL I could think was...OMG my family and this breakfast table has been SUCH blog fodder - and it's ONLY 8 freakin 45am!

I stinkin LOVE my CRAZY kids.  I LOVE how much Savy is like me and will argue with ANYONE and EVERYONE! And I LOVE how she is SO sweet, just like her Daddy.  I LOVE how much Justice is like me in all his quirkiness and brilliance.  And I LOVE how much he is just like his Daddy in that he will fiercely fight for those he loves, and how in his time can do anything he sets his mind to.  And I TRULY LOVE that the two of them have taught me that ultimately Justice WAS right ;) and Grand "isn't wrong about ANYTHING!"  She has raised AMAZING children (mostly on her own.) I am blessed to be raising mine with one of them.  She has taught me so many life lessons, when I have 'loosened-up' enough to learn them ;)  We have always been close, but I am so glad that I have grown up / matured over the years...and learned to talk less and listen more...Amazing, funny, HUGE Blessings Every single day!

Confessions...of a sucky mom..lol

Sometimes I think I suck...as a mom.  Especially as a 'Teacher-mom'...I'm not that prissy, fun, PTA, cookie baking, June Cleaver type...not one bit.  In fact I wear jeans to work MOST of the time ;) I am pretty fun I guess, I DID get suckered into the PTA (but I occasionally miss meetings..lol) Jay bakes the cookies (but I usually buy them..lol) so..well, maybe I'm getting there.  I think one of the BIG things I always beat myself up about is the whole night-time 'story time' or maybe it's reading books to them in general.  Now, don't get me wrong...I LOVE BOOKS. I have tons of books, just ask my husband!  Actually he would say..TOO MANY ;)  Our kids have TONS OF BOOKS...I'm a reader, they are readers...I just DON'T read to them all the time (**audible gasp!)  I didn't with Justice, and it was VERY obvious early on...that the kid was flippin brilliant..lol  I think he was going into the 3 year old room when he learned how to spell his name...in a couple of hours.  You see we had visited the classroom and I saw kids writing their names...and thought CRAP, he doesn't know his! Of course it was a 3-5 yo room..lol   So the next day (before he went in there...) we were driving around and I'm saying..."ok buddy it's..J-U-S...T-I...C-E..." I do this a FEW times and he says...let me try..."J-U-S-T-I-C-E"...um ok...Note to self...DON'T teach the kid anything else..or ALL future teachers will hate me ;)  He could read before he went to Kindergarten...he would chill out with his K teacher during 'naptime' and the two of them would read Captain Underpants books together.  Last year his 1st grade teacher introduced him to Matt Christopher.  This year his teacher has REALLY released him into the world of non-fiction and he is THRILLED!  He says it's the 'special section' that only he can check books out of in the library :)  He has also discovered a couple of series that he really enjoys - The Diary of a Wimpy Kid series, and The Boxcar Children.

Savy somehow also loves to read.  She has half a dozen Bibles and always wants to read stories about Baby Jesus, Mary and Joseph.  Justice started reading the Boxcar Children to her so we got her an easy reader version, it has colorful pictures and she can 'read' the entire story back to you...CRAZY!  That is the most amazing part to me, she can hear a story one or two times and then she can 'read' it to you...nuts!  She of course also loves all of her Princess and Barbie books...any that are PINK (barf..)

Anyways...the point to this entire blog...other than confessing my suckage ;) was that I found one of my childhood books today at a thrift store!!  As soon as I saw it on the shelf I squealed!  Andy and the Lion.  It was one of my faves, so I grabbed it up for the whopping  25 cents.  I also took a pic and sent it to my sis...she was tickled too :)  Well, you betcha we had story time tonight!  In the tent no less...haha, you see my silly, sweet kids have set up their pop up play tents in Justice's room...and decided to sleep in them.  Sweet, little, sleepy, reading blessings...every single day.

Did you say Sweet tea? OH...SWEETIE...

So it's been a while I know...and honestly it WOULD have been another day, but someone I love is having a birthday today ;) and I promised them some laughs!  Most everyone knows by now that I have the FUNNIEST kids...but I also have the SWEETEST kids.  Justice's spring Book Fair starts on Monday...he is getting SO excited!  They got to make a 'Wish List' for it in school today - it's the first thing he wanted to tell me about after school.  Book #1 - Awesome Weather (he IS after all both obsessed with and terrified by most natural weather disasters) Book #2 the Perfect Dress (for his baby sister...sweet, sweet boy!)  He went on to list several more for himself and then a few for 'a friend' - I asked who this friend was...and he just said...a special friend.  Now there are few things that I love more than books, I must say.  It just made me so happy that not only did he pick out some books, but he picked out books FOR OTHERS!

Savy is at a new school and LOVES it!  She actually said on the way to school this week "are we going to MY school? FIRST? cuz I WANT to go to school!"  Now you have to know my kids...this is NOT a normal saying for them...(I know...breaks the teacher-mama heart :(  but for real....she was SOO excited!! She loves her teachers, the school, everything about it!!  makes me SOO happy...She got a sweet note today too...said she was a LAMB...because "she's SO loving"...that's our girl!  We had a big evening planned too.  We took a special trip to the store to get her first REAL Barbie...the Special Retro $3 birthday one...She is so excited...my sweet, sweet princess is in bed in her Barbie jammies, with her Barbie doll, in her Princess sheets :) There's so much Pepto Pink it makes me want to BARF...and she couldn't be happier :)

The Olympics are over and we are so sad, STILL going through withdrawals...THANK goodness for Mario and Sonic at the Winter games...at least Justice can still pretend the games are still going ;)  He is STILL 'short-track' obsessed and tends to 'skate' around..lol  It sure didn't help when I bought him a book that had Apollo Ohno in it...and he discovered that they have the EXACT SAME birthday...HOLY COW!!  The princess has started to allow me to put her hair up..every now and then (we're getting somewhere!)   And the prince once again is sporting a Mohawk :)  Both of these make this mama VERY happy.  Happy little SWEET blessings EVERY SINGLE DAY!